The Happy List

Trying to write more on the Happy List. Check it out! Ladies, let's get back to posting more often, everything you add makes me smile too.

Always helps put things in perspective. If you want to get in on the catharsis and be added as a contributor, let me know!

Getting Involved

I'm all signed up to volunteer at Wine Riot next weekend! Sponsored by the Second Glass and the Weekly Dig, Wine Riot's goal is to ignore the snobbery of other wine tasting events, and get a younger, less stiff crowd involved. As part of this, they offered a free voucher for one of the sessions to people who would volunteer at another session. I'll be working set-up Friday morning, and then going to the night session on Saturday with the girls! Danielle has been really into wine lately and sparked some interest on my end, and this is a freeee way to get some new insight/a good buzz. I finish classes tomorrow, so it'll be a great way to celebrate!

I'm also planning to volunteer at the United Nations Association of Greater Boston's [UNAGB] Consuls Ball next weekend. My student group on campus, the Northeastern United Nations Association, works with UNAGB to host and staff Model UN conferences for middle and high school students. The ball is the big fundraiser for their Global Classrooms program, and I'm hoping to be able to talk up Northeastern's involvement as well as do a little on-the-sly networking for my jobless self.

To round off my volunteer excitement , my old roommate Sam is a project leader for Boston Cares, and I signed up to play with cats at the MSPCA with her on a few Saturdays in May! Boston Cares is a great volunteer organization that allows people to sign up for various projects and events without a long-term commitment, but lets them take advantage of free time they have to give back a little. I want to look into a few regular volunteer opportunities once we finish moving to Brookline as well.

One last volunteer/community give-back note: found HandsIn during some poking around on Twitter. Check it out! Their mission reads:

HandsIn harnesses the unique energy and creative passion of 20-somethings, inspiring them to connect with each other through volunteerism and empowering them to change their world through dedicated service and a shared commitment to a sustainable lifestyle.

As the world changes, the means of service are changing too, and this is definitely not your grandmother’s community service and lifestyle network. Instead, HandsIn uses the strength of what’s new and different to tackle the real problems of today’s world.

Change starts with you. Join HandsIn today to become a powerful agent of 21st century transformation!

Sounds like a plan to me!

Monday

Things that will help me make it through the week:

• Google Calendar. Runs my life. If you have Gmail and don't use the calendar, I am mystified by you.
• Tomorrow's yoga class--last one for the semester, but learning and remembering to focus on my breathing has probably saved my sanity the last few weeks. An hour a week where all I do is focus on my body and my breathing is amazing.
• Tonight's new Gossip Girl. Utter, utter trash. It's like fashion porn, and it's an hour of escapism. Similar to yoga, in that it allows time to focus on things other than current stressors.
• Going to DC on Wednesday. We're taking an overnight train: I loveee trains. And getting out of Boston means a mental scene change. It's my last Nationals conference for Model Arab League, and we have a great team going.
• My last day of college classes ever is three weeks from today. I just realized that. Wow. Wow.
  

Always Take the Higher Road

Lesson learned in the past few years: whenever I look back on a conflict situation, I always wish I had taken the higher road. Been the better woman. Left the petty things behind. Thought before I spoke. Kept my mouth firmly shut.

It's easy to mouth off. It's easy to make noise. It's never as easy to make amends, to apologize, or to make the other person understand why you had such a visceral reaction to something. I'm not saying the high road is the least painful road at the time. And I'm not saying that you can't still think the other person involved is completely and totally wrong. But if you make the scene, you de-legitimize your complaint. You look [and eventually] feel like you're more at fault than the other contributor. And it's fairly painful to remove your foot, or even your whole leg, from your figurative mouth.

Always be the better person. You already know you are, so just remember to act like it.

A little introspection never hurt....right?

I'm feeling very "work in progress" lately. The next month or two is all about wrapping up and starting over, basically at the same time, and it's causing a little bit of difficulty figuring out what to do and when. For a girl who's always a little indecisive when it comes to the big things, and who has trouble with change when its not on my own terms, it's been a little rough. My moods have been swinging, my behavior a little erratic, and introspection has been pretty heavy for me. Don't think introspection has led to any new conclusions: only new forms of crazy and indecisive as I come up with more things to think about. And I know this isn't any unique or defining state of being--I think that's been even harder on all of us, in some respects. Almost nobody in my life is grounded and sane enough to be a rock at the moment, so we all end up bearing the craziness on our own, reaching out to each other as best we can while trying not to add to each other's mental confusion. Between the economy, the job hunt, changes of location, and relationship dynamics [platonic and otherwise], we all have our emotional plates pretty full--and are wishing anyone else's plate looked attractive enough to pick a bite off of.

I don't mean to sound so melodramatic--but it's that quarter-life crisis time. Tomorrow morning, the mood will have swung, and I'll be day dreaming about my gorgeous new apartment, ignoring that I need to find a job to pay the rent. I'll be googling jobs in London for next year, as opposed to finishing my philosophy paper. I'll be planning city adventures with friends that may not be in the city at all any more in 6 weeks. Sometimes, I think it's good to have mood swings. It makes you delve a little deeper, and realize that the flipside of the intense emotions, both good and bad, exist on almost every topic. I've gotten some criticism lately for taking things too seriously, or getting too emotional or vocal about situations. While I'm not sure I always pick the right way to express things [yelling when I'm angry, or being THE loudest laugh at the bar], I think my passion, in both directions, is an important part of me. I care pretty intensely about the things I'm involved in and the people in my life, and I usually choose to express that, rather than internalize it. It may get me in trouble from time to time, speaking my mind and my feelings, but I'd rather know I felt things. I've come a long way in the past 5 years in terms of how and when I say my piece, but lately, I think I've been hellbent on reminding myself that I care.

Top Five Friday

1) The middle school teacher/advisor I talked to at the Model UN conference--she was busy looking up YouTube clips and other things online to help with a unit she's teaching, and telling me about getting grants/class time extensions to get more kids involved in their small school's MUN program. She's always so energetic and creative, and really dedicated to helping her kids learn and like it--not just swallow information verbatim and pass the MCAS

2) Not needing a coat today: a welcome change from 4 feet of snow and frigid Maine (although I miss the heated pool and comfy couches)

3) Having one more weekend of spring break before returning to the grind--some time to pull my life together and catch up on things.

4) My new business cards! Some are green with white font, and the other set are Moo Cards, and have different photos on the back that I took myself. Ask me for one!

5) Plans for the month of March! St. Patrick's Day, visiting Linda in Philly, Washington DC. As much as I love Boston, changes of scenery are great, and seeing people I miss is fantastic. On tap for the next few months: California, South Dakota, probably Pittsburgh.

Disconnect

We--a group of friends from freshman/sophomore year--are up in Maine for spring break. Sadly, no sunshine or beach time, but something almost better: no cell service! We have wireless, which is necessary for jobhunting/checking in with jobs some of us already work at, but the sheer delight of not having to answer my phone can't even be put into words. I'm sure when I turn it on as we head back to civilization Thursday it will practically explode with useless texts, tweets, and voicemails from the Northeastern Development office, wanting my nonexistant money. However, for now, I enjoy the snow, the comfy couches, the heated pool, and the disconnect from life in Boston.

There's about 4 feet of snow outside the gigantic house we rented near Sugarloaf. I went snowshoeing, and didn't even make too big an ass of out myself. Tomorrow, I'm going to attempt to ski for the second time ever: that will probably prove hilarious for all, photos will come when I get back to the city. We have a big heated pool that looks out in the snowy mass that is our yard, full of elaborate snow forts that the boys built, and a few 4 foot deep holes where I sunk all the way in. The house is big and quirky, and has some pretty ridiculous flaws, but plenty of bedrooms and couches and a huge kitchen and downstairs den--and a pingpong table, where I routinely get schooled but am amping up my level of competition. Danielle's venturing up from the city tonight, and we come back Thursday, in time for me to help out at a high school Model UN conference back at NU, and pull my life together over the weekend.

It's comfortable here. It's nice to be with kids I've known for so long--no pressure, nothing crazy, just hanging out, enjoying what I've realized is the last traditional spring break we'll all be able to take together before real jobs, people leaving for grad school elsewhere, and other typical post-grad scatter. On that note--back to sitting on the couch with them. :)

Definitions

Senioritis

Definition: the ability to convince oneself that going out on a Wednesday night is infinitely more important than a philosophy paper worth at least 20% of a class grade.

Additional facets: when the paper is due in less than 2 hours, and you are on facebook, twitter, or, even better, blogging about your inability to care about the paper or any other school work.

One step further: staring out the window is far more preferable/rational/productive than referencing philosophers on the subject of natural rights.

Synonyms: apathy, alcoholism, oblivion.
Antonyms: productivity, A+ on that paper.

Use it in a sentence: Marisa's senioritis led her to imbibe many delicious cocktails with her friends on a weeknight, kept her convinced that her philosophy paper wouldn't matter in 10 years, a month, or tomorrow, and helped her justify sleeping in on top of it all. NU 09.

[to make myself feel better, I am reminding everyone that I do have almost 100% in Legal Argumentation, for what that's worth.]

Positivity and Shoes

"And the less I seek my source for some definitive, the closer I am to fine."
-indigo girls-

We had a really good, positive executive eboard meeting last night. There has been some really tricky conflict in the group this semester, with some opposition, passive aggression, and lots of bitching behind everyone's back. My actions definitely played a role in some of the negativity. Everything came to a bit of a head during the Harvard Model UN conference a week or two ago, forcing us to confront some of the clashing of minds.

By acknowledging the friction, we can actually deal with the issues head on, and it was necessary to put the issue out in the open. The stress wasn't so much with each other as with some of the problems the organization is dealing with this semester. We all discussed the need to see each other as resources and walls to bounce ideas and stress off, and reminded ourselves that even if we yell or get upset about something, it shouldn't get personal and we should be more of a support for other eboard members.

After we put the tension issue out in the open, it made it a lot easier to interact without the hedging, combative doubletalk we'd been dealing with. A lot more laughing, a lot more understanding, and a smoother path to accomplishing tasks and working through the myriad to-do items for the United Nations Association. I'm hoping it stays like this: we all work hard and care about the goals and members of the organization, and it's a lot more fun when we're not snarking at each other and can work together more happily.


Random piece of advice: if your shoes hurt, but your day isn't over yet, don't bother taking them off. It will only hurt worse when you have to put them back on. ahhhhhhh.

Rainy Sunday Musings

Update on my life status:

1. Did not get an interview for the first job I applied for/actually wanted. Disappointing.
   
2. Have since sent in two more applications, and have notes on another half dozen job postings of interest to get started on. Let's cross fingers and toes for at least an interview sometime in the next month. [as I was writing this, one of the places I applied emailed to say they just filled the position. Sweet....]
   
3. Signed my lease in Coolidge Corner! Bon and I (and Toomey for the summer) will be in Brookline until August 2010 as it currently stands. We have plans for lovely home design, good lighting, big bookshelves, and maybe a cat! Lots of updates on apartment-related things to come--I've never lived off-campus except for a sublet, and I have myriad ideas.
   
4. Lots and lots of "Oh good, I'm not the only crazy one" conversations. We're all at bizarre places in life right now, and it's good to know I have plenty of solid company in overanalysis and procrastination.
5. People are getting engaged and getting pregnant (separate people, no shotgun weddings in my crowd yet). I still think of everyone I know as approximately 16 and therefore not in any sort of position for those things. But babies are cute, even if it freaks me out watching people I know holding them (I would post the picture of Leif with the baby Nikki nannies for if it didn't make me laugh so hard. I might still.)
   
6. I am having the strongest travel urges lately. Part of me hopes I DON'T get a job right away, and would then have an excuse to just buy a plane ticket and a nice camera and disappear for a little while. Sites like The Big Picture make me want to take the kinds of photos that inspire emotion and a different way of understanding things.
7. Trying to solve my constant indecision/grass-is-always-greener problem. I can see the pros and cons of almost anything, and I need to find a few anchoring principles to try and cut the internal haggling down a little.
8. Getting off of campus more often. Sam and I went to see Arusi Persian Wedding at the Boston Public Library yesterday, and also picked up information for some events going on for International Women's Day in March. When I worked at the Women and Public Policy Program at the Kennedy School, they put on some great programming, and I'd love to check out some of it there and around the city this year.

Off to a United Nations Association executive board meeting...it'll be strange to end my involvement on campus when I graduate, but also freeing after putting hours and hours of time into it for five years...